What Millennials Don’t Know About Voting

i-voted-sticker Boo turned 18 in July, so the upcoming election is the first time she will be able to vote.  She is a budding social justice warrior, so she’s stoked about voting.  She’s spent a lot of time educating herself about the candidates and issues, and she understands the importance of voting — having her voice heard, supporting the democratic process, civic participation, blah, blah, blah . . . . She gets that.

What she may not completely understand is some of the underappreciated benefits of voting, so I’ve shared them with her.  Now I’m sharing them with you too. You’re welcome.

The Underappreciated Benefits of Voting

  1. The stickers. (Duh!)
  2. You get to be a superhero because you fought to save the world from the Trumpocalypse. Spandex outfit is optional.
  3. Your Mom will not kick you out of the house on the grounds of dumbassery.
  4. Legalized weed. In 3 years. When you turn 21. And not a minute sooner. Also, do as I say, not as I do.
  5. You can have riveting conversations about politics at parties. Like this one.
  6. You get to vote on issues related to porn. (See California’s Prop. 60) And who doesn’t love a good old-fashioned porn vote?
  7. Being able to travel abroad without having to explain WTF happened.
  8. Polling place games. image
  9. Canceling out the vote of your dimwitted cousin.
  10. A President with a vagina of steel.

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